- I'll get to eat cake batter and cookie dough again, for one. (Most other things with raw egg I have been happy to avoid.)
- Everyone will get to meet daddy's little girl and make all the comments like "oh she has Christian's nose!" To which, my dad will most-likely reply, "no she doesn't, she has her own nose." I just hope she doesn't get my nose (but that would fall more in the things I'm scared of category).
- I'll get to stop thinking things like "why does it feel like I'm carrying around a bucket of water...oh because I am."
- I'll finally get to be my own boss and have my dream career. I'll be an entrepreneur--well, a social entrepreneur, anyway. My new business will be full of imagining, telling stories and making pies. And probably a lot of other stuff...but that brings me to why I'm scared out of my mind.
I'm scared out of my mind because:
- I know I'll mess up with some of the little things and not make her practice her piano enough. Or too much. Or she will catch me laughing when she's trying to be serious. Or I will let her cry too long. Or I will cry too long.
- What if I mess up with some of the big things, too? Like what if we name her the wrong name?
- As much sleep as I am NOT getting now, I'm pretty sure in 100 days, I will be getting much less.
- What if my gag reflex never goes away and her first memory is of me gagging while I change her diaper or feed her some awful baby food? (OK, I hope she's out of diapers before her memory kicks in).
- What if she likes Christian more than me? That's pretty clear already because she hasn't once kicked him, and she loves to kick me.
- What if she loves glitter? I really don't think I can handle glitter.
*Disclaimer: I'm not really expecting her to show up right on her due date, since I'm not sure those really mean much of anything anyway.